Writing It Down Was the Hardest Part

Writing the Hardest Part

I have a book coming out on September 9th.

Even just writing that sentence brings up a wave of emotion. Because the truth is, putting this book into the world is the most public, most vulnerable thing I have ever done.

It’s not a memoir, though my personal story is woven into every page. It’s a guide. A philosophy. A deeply human offering to anyone who has ever loved someone struggling with substance use and wondered, What about me?

The book is called Parallel Recovery: A Guide for Those Who Love Someone with Substance Use Disorder. And writing it, really writing it, meant finally allowing myself to be seen. Not just by clients or in quiet support group circles, but out loud. In print. On shelves. In hands I may never hold.

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Becoming Who I Needed

When my son was in the depths of his struggle, I was drowning in silence. I looked for help, for community, for language that made sense of what I was feeling. And what I found, when I found anything at all, was fragmented, often focused solely on the person using substances, and rooted in shame, urgency, or control.

So I began to ask different questions.

• What does healing look like for me, even if my loved one isn’t ready?

• What if recovery didn’t mean detachment, but deeper connection?

• What if we could stop measuring progress in ultimatums, and start building something sustainable?

  
  

That’s how Parallel Recovery® began. Not as a program. Not as a brand. But as survival.

Over time, it evolved into a philosophy grounded in sustainability and connection at the core - a way to stay in relationship with ourselves and our loved ones, without abandoning either.

Telling the Truth Out Loud

There’s something terrifying about putting your story into words that strangers might read. There were moments, many of them, when I questioned whether I should write it at all.

What if it’s too much? What if it’s not enough? What if people misunderstand?

But then I’d return to the heart of it: I wasn’t writing this book to impress. I was writing it to companion. To reflect back the quiet ache so many carry. To say to someone who feels invisible in their own family: You are not alone. You are not broken. You are not failing.

I’ve sat with hundreds of families in rooms and on screens, and I’ve heard the same whisper in different voices: “I’m lost in this. Where do I go from here?”

This book is my offering. My map. My hand outstretched.

More Than OK

One of the things I’ve learned through my own journey is that healing doesn’t require us to be “OK” all the time. It requires us to be honest. To stay connected. To show up, even when our voices shake.

Writing this book was hard. It brought me to the edge of my own discomfort over and over again. But it also reminded me that this, the willingness to be seen, to tell the truth, to walk alongside others, is the heart of Parallel Recovery®.

I wrote the book I needed. And maybe you need it too.

With courage, connection, and a hand on your back,

Lisa